Love and Marriage

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Last week another man killed his family and then killed himself. Beyond the sadness of these events, I naturally found myself wondering why these men chose to do this.

And even more, I wondered if they sought help or counsel when things started going south? And if they didn't why not?

In relationships, I think its easy for guys to fall even further into the trap of not talking about things. Right or wrong, being able to provide for and take care of your family is a huge part of being the guy in the relationship. I can definitely understand how the inability to do that could have a negative effect on a guy's self esteem and lead down a road to depression.

But being a good mate isn't just about paying bills and buying stuff. The other side of the coin in being a good husband or boyfriend is taking care of yourself, mentally and physically. Too many of us are lax on both of those, especially the mental part.

No matter how tough people are, the simple act of sitting down, picking up a phone and telling someone about your problems is difficult and almost impossible for some. I definitely have trouble talking about things sometimes.

However, when it gets to the point where violence toward your family is floating through your head, its time to drop the BS and go get help.

And that's not just in the extreme, unfortunate cases of these men and their families. Its also for the physical and verbal abusers out there. There is just no reason to sit and allow yourself to go down a dark road mentally. You owe to your family and yourself to go and get help.

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